Crystal Clear Perceptions

A Traveller`s Tale

2011-12-05T07:00:00.001-08:00

hanging between comfortable spaces,
you`re just a lover of me.
complaining,
look how much you`ve wasted!
you`re just waiting to cut and bleed.

sugar you.
bitter core.
bent mind.
city folklore.

clinging to the neon haze,
you`re just a pink shade of green.
looking for the Clear Light
you`re just a scene in a dream.

sugar you.
bitter core.
burning signs.
a settled score.

lover boy, where are you going?
wandering away from her.
look how far you`ve come.
dreamer boy, where are you going?
dont believe your dark side,
he`s not the One.

Forever Young

2011-11-19T08:34:00.001-08:00

Though I hide at the end of the world,
I believe, some day, you`ll come for me.
Eyes wide shut. Lips in a curl.
I follow a heart that can see.

Beyond plastic manners
and limits you were taught to obey
you are waiting for yourself
to rise, and say -

we`re free and forever young.
that`s how we were born
we`re free and forever young
each with his own song

there`s all the time in the world
and more beyond
for people to change
for people to grow
for people to love
for people to know
there`s all the time in the world
for it all to reload.
yes,
there is a time for everything.

beyond plastic manners
and limits you were taught to obey
you are waiting for yourself
to rise and say -

we`re free and forever young
it`ll always be that way
we`re free and forever young
and, that`s how we`ll stay.

you can`t set me free,
i`m already there
breathing silently
in a deafening silence
I worked hard for my peace.

BETTER THAN THAT

2011-11-03T08:08:00.000-07:00

"is it fair, father?
should they end my life at will?
not one did i harm
not one did i kill.
why then must i ingloriously die
in a low cold prison cell,
hidden from loving eyes?"

"i confess, father.
my intention was flawed
but my invention was a genius.
it was a weapon that could empower my nation -
and cut away the stagnation
and free us of humiliation
and overthrow every other oppression."
Father said, "an attempt to disfigure creation?"

"but as a child, father -
no mother pulled me to her breast
with no family was i blessed.
the only love i had ever known
was the affectionate spit or the fond curse
that the Workers at the Factory hurled,
when they were pleased at
the gunpowder i curled
around curiously coloured wires."

" i tried, father -
to sneak and listen to the lessons at the village school.
i tried, father -
to make of myself, a better fool -
i heard the master say,
GIVE YOUR BEST TO ALL YOU DO
and that i did, father."

"we packed bombs
we made guns
we burned homes
we had fun, o dear father..
and all i ever wanted was
to give my best to all i did,
and be better than that
just keep at it
and be better than that."

and so, father
one day i mastered my art
but the Workers, jealous in the heart,
took away my child from me
and raped me of my rights
and sent me here to fight
through the last days of my noble life.

tell me please, father -
was it fair?"

My Old friend.

2011-11-01T23:51:00.001-07:00

Today we are part
Fear, my dear old friend.
I think I shall miss you,
though I am unfamiliar with such a space,
a void without your warm embrace.
a little lost, a little hopeless.
twisting and turning in memories of your caress.

what life is this?
so numb and mute.
so tranquil
like a sleeping shoot.
i know not such peace.
where life and death meet
the sharpest tip
the Heaven`s dip.
what life is this?

the days behind us,
when on cold mornings you warmed my heart
with tender words,
when the stormy world tore me apart
and stripped me to the soul
and shook me to the bone.
you kissed my eyes close
and lifted my head
and laid it on your chest
forever to rest.

When on nights of heat
you blew soft breaths at my feet
and brought fresh rains of peace
that my fever soothed.
beads of sweat oozed
from the pain of an unthinkable love.
rain and sweat and tears clubbed,
made memories forevermore.

Today we are part
Fear, my old friend.
I have lost you in the deep,
for, you were never mine to keep.
In the minds of others you will be born,
and another like me,
will be torn
and twisted and turned on
those giant waves of your unthinkable love.
I shall only watch from far
and delight in their new love stories.

random thoughts

2011-10-20T10:38:00.000-07:00

listen to the beating heart,
in your ears, in your fingers and your chest,
and all the rest..
We beat as one.
The wheel turning,
moving with the beat,
that rhythm of a booming drum!

------------------------------------------------------------------

Time, good friend, i met you behind thick curtains of space.
Frilled with dust and brown lace.
And you wore a look of stone, tirelss and calm.
They said you were a healer, stitching wounds and guarding from harm.
Where did i lose you on the way? Have you left me and gone a lonely land to stay?

The Edge

2011-10-13T07:44:00.000-07:00

-- she thought of death and brought it to life, she thought of death till she died --

rest your worried mind
my Little One
rest on my shoulder
your young memories
and watch them grow older.
why dont you
sit on the edge of the world
between the endless Light and darkness
and be the peace.

2011-08-12T23:53:00.000-07:00

what did yellow do
to deserve being yellow?
did green do the same?
do they differ in the same way,
or is it just a change of name?

a few drops of rain
trickles slow
like blood..
making colourful veins
through a masterpiece of paints,
that was resting in peace
on a dry canvas.

On a summer evening..

2011-08-04T08:38:00.000-07:00

a neon thread stitching my dark thoughts together
dont divide the one from the other
that`s not how the Mother
meant it to be.

My heart beating, with a thousand war-drums, in my ear
my mind weaving a bouquet of fears,
blowing the fragrance
over candy crystal photo-frames,
from which both people and pain
are fading.

I sit in a giant flower
the giant petals are each a sleeping peacock.
I patiently await my hour
and listen to the Breath Clock.
the rise and fall of a collective sleepy breath..
a rise and fall
a rise and fall
that never resting Breath Clock.

Those prints on your fingers
with lines in spirals and waves
Are stamps of your karma
that seal your body over time and age.

We are huddling turtles on the broadway
- which is, in a rather odd way -
the Giant Tongue.
Look!
it`s wrapping us all up, one by one.
like a toad rolls in his favourite fly for dinner.

Cielo

2011-08-01T10:06:00.000-07:00

deep are the forests
and wide are the rivers
that meet you on the way to Cielo.

The city with misty eyes
houses with faces
houses with names
houses that talk
about things which are strange.

Where green waters flood the land
One-eyed fish swim on purple-blue sand.
Drink the clouds if you so please
think them first, and then eat.
Where food is thought
and flesh is not
all that necessary -
where you are your own fairy.
god.
mother.

And there is no other
different from You.

Such a place where nothing really moves
nothing needs to.
where no one pays
and nothing is due.

In Cielo
where feather-rocks
and hanging cliffs
float dead in peace.

Where the butts and If(s)
have willingly ceased.

You must step off
dive into the fire
must straight drop
through one into another sky
and keep going higher.
you cannot tire.

Deep are the forests
and wide the rivers
that meet you on the way to..

The Eagles

2011-07-26T07:51:00.000-07:00

a dying sun spills blood red rays
on stone faced clouds
that stand above, looking.
will he ever know who took him?

Rest your thoughts a while
on the wings of the eagles flying high,
in peace,
unwavering but still in motion.
Dark winged angels,
roll and wrap themselves in the dust
and dirt we throw up.
They are messengers of the Saviour.
They come not to teach
(but you may learn if you so wish)
the wisdom of the eagles rests on those dark wings.

Beat the air
stir and pinch it
disturb it
scatter the silence
into a thousand shimmering pieces
but only for a moment.

Do it
like the many mundane chores
that help you be a being.

A few moments lost
helps one to find and enter the eternal Flow.
It helps them soar..
round and round
in a circle of brown
higher than the mind can go.

Diana

2011-05-19T11:39:00.000-07:00

she`s just a broken heart
she`s just a scattered mind
she`s just a tune on the record
just a clock keeping time.

she`s the spot of light
on dark still waters.
a buzz in a sleepy head,
she`s the moment of silence
after all`s been said.

she`s your last breath
she`s your best bet
she`s your secret dairy poem
she`s your mistress
the only seamstress
she`s your soul-guide, your blessed totem.

Alitaptap

2011-04-26T03:55:00.000-07:00

sing to me,
the forgotten tale
of the heartless girl and her frail
forehead star.

Once there came on a heavenly chariot
the saviours of a suffering tribe
they bought rain and peace
and all that would ease the pain
and water what was dry.

Then to them
was born a wonder child,
who had no heart
but a magic dial
that looked like a bright star, on her forehead.
Alitaptap as she was called
did not know
that she would fall
one day,
to what was her Fate.
the bright star
gave her life
and made her live
and made her grow
and oh,
how beautiful she was.
her dark hair and flaming eyes
lit up the days
and pierced the nights
for those who were in love with her.
but she knew no love,
for she had no heart
you could cut her in two,
or join the parts
but it would`nt bring her pain
she was beyond losses and gains.
for the magic star that rested on her head
gave her a life only half-dead.

Then one day
she was asked to marry a lad
the news didnt make her happy or sad
for,she could not feel what she did not know
and that is how her story goes.
In seething anger
her godly father struck
and shattered her star
with his mighty sword
in a careless blow.
but oh,
Alitaptap would never know
anger,love or sorrow
for, the heartless princess
was hollow.

The magic forehead star
scattered near and far
and by the soul of the girl
with a new life, the pieces unfurled.
And to this day,
they twinkle at night
kissing the darkness
with their faint light
magic fire flies
sing of Alitaptap
and her flaming eyes.

..and its never goodbye

2011-04-13T11:23:00.000-07:00

nothing`s left of me or us,
but you must be doing fine some where.
your face fills my glassy eyes
killing my empty stare.
and if we should meet
on some rainy day
i promise, we`ll sing again.

its never goodbye
it never was
a half truth or a sacred lie.
its never goodbye
with what you left behind
in me and mine
its never goobdye.

the winds howl in my head
the storm bleeds me dry
but its you i`m searching for
its your tears, i cry.
and if we should meet
on some rainy day
i promise, we`ll sing again.

its never goodbye.

An Other Zone

2011-03-18T22:59:00.000-07:00

(I sit dosing at my window. A Thought Bubble comes drifting, like a stray bee, and pop!)

what if this life wasn`t given to me
what if this life wasn`t mine
to think, I am unborn
untrapped in space and time.

if the seed was to sleep forever
in disobedience of the laws of nature,
would that not be the original sin?

the seed that is not dead - for, it never lived -
is one with its Master. it is still.
the seed that is awake in a Sleep Life,
crouches comfortable,deeply unconscious.

What moulds it? What makes manifest?
What destroys and begins this quest?

a sudden burst of light in the dark
a sudden stirring, a shock and a spark.
a summon that raises waters in a vertical crystal beam,
a summon that causes fire-clouds to rain, and make streams,
and the earth to quake and shiver -
to spin faster in its final dance of destruction.

as the Supermoon steps closer
to embrace its lover, the earth,
winds howl and tides crash,
death rushes toward another birth.

the days go fast, they won`t last
the days grow tired
the days grow tired.
the days are short
full of rainbow desires.

the nights are long
a giant yawn
it stretches on
it stretches on.

is your Sun dull and red?
if your World almost dead?

Then its time.
its time to pass
to Another Zone
through the ancient port
which to The Few is known.

awaken the seed
make it breathe
grow as you will - be lush grass or weed.
grow as you will - be good or evil, both we need.

Talk

2011-01-26T10:14:00.000-08:00

Tick tock tick tock
its not just clock talk.
its my pulse talking in my ears.

We talk, not because we want to
but because we need to.
talk talk talk
words in a state of shock
filling the silence.

silence..
that sound, which is too much to bear with empty ears.
presses down, the talk that`s been buzzing for years.

silence..
when the Souls are together and one
when mirrors are many, reflections none.

silence..
when love speaks loud and true
when all you are is all you do.

Soulshine

2011-01-22T10:23:00.001-08:00

He told me I`d live a 1000 lives
I`ve died nine ninety nine
and now i`m running out of time
I`ve got to find my soulshine

so I look for the pit
and roll into it
I find an old skin
with my name on it
I slip in
but it just doesn`t fit.

so I spread my mind
across the sky
wrap up the light
and pack in the night
and all of creation is mine
till I open my eyes
and find, I`ve lost my sight.

He told me I`d live a 1000 lives
I`ve lived nine ninety nine
and now I`ve run out of time
I`ve got to find my soulshine

Morph

2010-12-20T02:15:00.000-08:00

all that belongs to me
all that I belong to -
is changing.
though the past is melting fast
the loop ends at the start
and its the same thing.
this is not my world.
this is not my time.

can you tell between freedom and fate?
between symbol and sign?
I tell you -
this is not my world.
this is not my time.

Leap

2010-11-27T11:40:00.000-08:00

in a wink, it happened.
the clock told me I was ahead of my time.
it was 10 to 9
I rubbed my eyes
and opened them wide
it was 10 to 9
but I was sure in my head
that the last time I checked
it was 30 to 9
had I jumped time?
I closed my eyes
waiting to leap again
waiting to get back to my zone.
my home.
what would happen then?
I looked again,
all was still, nothing stirred.
I had borrowed from time,
it did lend.

Birds of Prey

2010-09-06T12:55:00.001-07:00

and it landed softly
next to me,
folded its muslin wings back in place
all signs of flight
tucked smoothly out of sight
without a trace.

with silent steps
it approached from behind
i was busy dreaming
locked inside my mind
when it sharply piecered
the base of my neck
with its long pipe-like beak
and attached itself to me
like a leech.

it grew and grew
feeding on my soul
and every happy thing i knew
refilling me with gloom
like a sudden eclipse on a sunny afternoon.

the weaker I
the stonger It
the lesser the hope
the easier it is to quit.

Retrograde Motion - prelude

2010-08-18T12:05:00.000-07:00

What is real
is not really real.
To believe, then, is not wrong -
that there is another you
another me
just a little different than us or we,
on a distant horizon
where frozen emotions are locked and sealed
in unmoving frames..
waiting for you to release them.

To believe then, is not wrong
that your dreams are true -
they have been so, all along.

what is more true?
what i learn
or what i am taught by you?
what is true
is not the truth.

Divinity born on the waves
perhaps on a yawning tide
may that Goddess of Love now
be my guide
with her favourite number,
the blessed five,
as i pass between worlds and
swirls of time.

even to this day
her orders we obey
the golden words she wrote
the unbending rules she made -
that Life shall be linear
and Love, retrograde.

Second Last Chorus (for you)

2010-06-27T11:02:00.000-07:00

we break, we make
we split, we separate.
but there`s no stopping you
once you`re on the road

tell me when you get there
write to me, when u`ve time to spare
its a magic land but dont lose yourself
but just in case you do
remember i`ll come looking for you

its a time, clock hands stretched from 3 to 9,
it looks like a simple snake smile.
when you think you`re high
jus look down upon yourself - you`ll be fine.
nothing`s too tough when you know you`re trying.
soon it`ll be your turn to shine.

a lonely guitar stumming tears on tunes
a deep voice whispering truths, and soon
you`ll be called
though it isnt your fault
you`ll be called
just remember to stand tall.

and when the deeds are done
and you`ve purged your sins in the sun
i`ll still be waiting by the same door
for you to come.
but till then..
remember to tell me when you get there
write to me, when you`ve time to spare
its a magic land but dont lose yourself
and just in case you do
remember i`ll come looking for you.

random thoughts - revisited

2010-06-11T08:30:00.000-07:00

i`m stuck on this paper
in an incomplete story
they call me Hero
but i`m only half drawn.
those who love me
shall be punished with death
to many pieces shall be torn.

i`m waiting for someone
or someday
to come and turn this page
i`m waiting for someone
or someday
to lift the cage.
put an end to me
or to this,
my story.

PENANCE

2010-05-29T09:15:00.001-07:00

how i cry but hide my tears?
cry in the rain.
how do i train my fears?
eat the pain.
is it fair that i should not be loved
is it fair that this should be my fate?
answer me, please.

as you sow so shall you reap
if you do and not be discreet
this is the end you shall meet.
the germ is always in the seed.

random thoughts - part ii

2010-04-24T05:47:00.000-07:00

i crossed a well
with an empty belly
my thirst was growing
the sun was throwing
upon me, curses.

the first, hated me.

i crossed another well
with murky water
my thirst was growing
the winds were throwing
upon me, curses.

the second, didnt love me.

i crossed a third
brimming with fresh clear water
lovely as can be
much like a dream to me.
my thirst was growing
the fire in my throat was throwing
upon me, curses.
tossing me from side to side
tossing me on a dry tide.
i drank, i drank
the fresh clear water
a clever poison..
the more i drink
the more i die
the more i die
the more i drink
the less i try
to correct myself:
now i know, the thirst was never meant to be quenched - it was meant to kill.

Talking through the dawn

2010-04-18T08:32:00.000-07:00

perhaps i am blind now
quite out of my mind now
trusting is a tough task
but i`m changing too fast

perhaps i am calm now
a little less alarmed now.
the heavens pour peace through you
talking to another dawn, it all feels new.
so

you make me want to love
you make me want to ask, again.
you made me want to undo all i have done
something tells me it might be worth the run
the quiet smile in you
speading happiness inside me too
i can never get enough of you
or maybe i just dont want to.

perhaphs its all too soon
feels like i always knew
someday i`d come to you
and this love would be true

perhaphs this life will melt away
but
heaven awlays finds a way
to make the true love stay
talking to another dawn it all feels new

dont believe them
when they say the night wont fade
dont believe them
when they say there is no way
dont beleve them
just let your heart show you the way.

you make me want to love
you make me want to ask, again.
you made me want to undo all i have done
something tells me it might be worth the run
the quiet smile in you
speading happiness inside me too
i can never get enough of you
or maybe i just dont want to.

random thoughts - part 1

2010-04-10T05:55:00.000-07:00

what i believe in
is what you`ve been dreaming
of.
there`s no escaping
the tears that are streaming
but you can wait a while
for a rewind;
at the end of it all-
its all in your mind

but -
my mind is a hollow
a cool dark space
a secret place
with mirrors all around
- what a waste!
without any light you cant see your face.

they say i push them away
and thats not fair
i say, i push them away
only beacuse i care.

The Land of the Water Bearer

2010-02-17T22:16:00.000-08:00

Far away, in a distant land
where nothing but Imagination roams,
there stands
the Water Bearer
all alone.

legend has it -
all who stray
will find their way
to the Water Bearer.

Water, they say
is the giver of life.
it spins and awakens the heart
it knocks the brain to start.
The Water Bearer`s drink
was of a different kind
kills the heart
feeds the mind
feeds the pride
feeds the light
that is of no use to the blind.

It "taketh as it giveth".

He pours the deadly drink
to wandering travellers
the thirst is but an excuse.
the more they think
the more they drink
the more they pay;
the more they disobey
the Inner Voice.

the Potion makes them strong;
fit to face what`s beyond
but it drains the heart
killing them, bit by bit
part by part.

and when the last drop in the jar,
travels all the way to the rim
lingers and clings
finally dives in
touching the tounge-tip of the zombie traveller
the poision has already travelled too far.

though he is strong enough
to face the world beyond
he has no heart now
his inner self, lost and gone.

intelligence over imagination
can take you far -
indeed..
only further from yourself.
too far, to remember who you are.

The Ghost Train

2010-01-28T05:45:00.000-08:00

the day wont come
the wait wont end
its been a long stretch
but the road still wont bend

the ground slithered `neath
it slipped past, swiftly away
the cool, quiet and clouded moon
examined the talkative city-
They stayed still, for a moment at least.

as the wheels move on
Ghost Riders wait for dawn
a journey that doesnt sleep
is Theirs forever to keep.
from the Lake of Greed
to the Land of Peace,
time`s been stretched
and now is still.

the wheels move on
Ghost Riders glide along
tracks invisible to man,
hollow eyes,hollow mouths
singing hollow tunes, as best they can.
the chimney smokes clouds of red
the engine rumbles
to the song of the dead.
it isnt over yet
it isnt over yet.

Break Me.

2009-10-05T14:18:00.000-07:00

i`ve lived my life in a house called Thunderstorm
i`ve struggled to believe i can right the wrong
and still
they call me a Fake
ask me not to waste
my time on this.
he said i`m a sinner
and my chance to heaven just got thinner
to them i`d like to say
you can try but you cant break me

it hurt,it pained,it sunk deep and stained me
it pricked,it chased,it sucked dry and drained me.
i turn around and say
you can try but you cant break me

dont sit happy, no, i`m not done
dont be calm, no, you haven`t won.
you had your chance
now it`s my turn;
on you i`ll put my mark
and watch you burn.

it`ll remind you that you should`ve nevr tried to break me.

dont you ever try to break me
you didnt make me
you`ll never break me.

The Note

2009-09-20T07:41:00.000-07:00

I`m not coming back, mom
I`m not coming home
I`ve done the laundry
dont worry
took the garbage out
before i left.
locked the doors
the house is safe,
so am I,
somewhere far away.
somewhere they can`t find me.

I`m not coming back, love
my bags had been packed long ago
Now, dont pretend you didnt know
dont pretend you needed to be told
I`m sorry, but I have to go
you ran out of me
You were always slow
I`m sorry, love, but I have to go.

I`m not coming back home
Not because I have to go
But because i can`t stay, anymore
I`m leaving this note
because I think you should know.

Human Phoenix

2009-09-03T04:16:00.000-07:00

rip it
tear it
the flesh
the burnt skin
step out! step out!
from within,
be born tomorrow.

only you tower
above mundane pain
only you have the power
to remain
only you draw breath
in every death
waken yourself from depths
and rise
you, rise again.

only you can fill your hollows
only you can revive
only you can be born of yourself
its only you, if you try.

you`re the faith burning inside
you`re the shadow riding high
to them, you`re just another lie
to me, you`re a Magi

you`re the bird alive in ashes
you`re the human child, more than dust
you`re the eternal silence that crushes
falsity and mistrust.
thunder wrapped around your fingers
the earth quaking beneath your feet
storms breathing heavy in your eyes
you personify Belief.

Only Human

2009-08-01T02:33:00.000-07:00

To err is human ---
that`s all we do.
To err is human ---
that`s our whole truth.

As meek as a plant
As vicious as a beast
I`m the best of both
I`m human, to say the least.

I can reason
I can speak
I sell Treason
like a creep.

I can cut and shape
I think I can create.
Often willingly forget
I`m a no more than a flesh puppet.

To what end have I driven my race?
Disobedience, dolor and disgrace.
All the while thirsting for more
My soul, dry to the core.
But, no !
I will not confess
I will not tidy the mess.

Bleaker than a plant
Weaker than a beast
I`m the worst of both,
I`m human, to say the least.

unforgotten

2009-07-30T01:25:00.000-07:00

tornado
torn bravado
secret keeper under cover
a caustic lover
a never believer
a pain reliever
an easy rover
rolling over
where are you going?

I thought
you`d be my shadow
I thought
you`d fade with me
so I thought
we`d have a story
beyond the imaginary.
Like a child lost in visions, I thought we could turn time.
All grown up, now I see
our love was just a polished image I had in my mind

wishlist

2009-07-28T03:52:00.000-07:00

Crash and burn

its your turn

i`ve had my go

didnt want it though.

They say the Gods will frown

and the world will drown

and there will be night ---

no,it wont be a pretty sight.

But if I write a book

hide it down below

many years from now

it`ll be found, and i`ll know

some one somewhere found me.

Thats my wish

I know you have some too

dont bother to list them

`cause they wont come true.

But if you`ve got time to spare

might as well sit and prepare

for a couple of crashes and burns

twists and turns

its all in your head, I swear.

ALL FOR LOVE

2009-06-24T21:44:00.000-07:00

whatever that happened
whatever i denied,
will never ever be forgotten
never sanctified.
whatever we could have done,
somehow we did not.
when the mind games are no more fun
you`ll see
we did it all for love.
the night`s here
but now i long for the dawn
when the dawn arrives
i`ll wish, the night was more long..

Back to evil

2009-06-19T23:20:00.000-07:00

we run
we`re done
busy losing our breath
busy trying to get
somewhere!

we`re fools
used tools.
we`re all set
happy to forget
our cares.

we`re busy being busy
scared to be lazy
scared of idleness
guarding against
the devil and his mess..

why so weak, child?
darkness will fade in a while.
like hell leads to heaven
so in the good is the evil.

Why so meek, child?
follow the ugliness
enjoy this idleness
its the only way out of this mess
the kiss is a curse
when times get worse
but
its the only way out of this mess.

Looking back

2009-06-18T22:07:00.000-07:00

hard times just got harder
i think i just got smarter
the light in the distance
though it reaches me today
its been there forever.
when i touch it
look back at you
i see
i`ve been there forever too.

It`s just a matter of time --

i try not to feel
and try not to be
you cant believe what you see
every bit of you is me.
and my pain sets me free.

Hold On

2009-06-12T11:32:00.000-07:00

we`r stuck in paradise
its heaven all around
it feels nice
it feels warm in your arms

and then reality knocks
we throw open our eyes
we`r on a crumbling rock
we`re the truth stuck in a ring of lies.

fire all around
hell is right here, right now
we need to hold on
and how
we`re all we`ve got
we need to hold on
need to be strong
need to make our song
wont let it go wrong.

close your eyes, my love
we`ll be back among clouds and melodies
heal me, my love
we`ll be together high above miseries
hold me, my love

and the fire around will melt to streams of silver
heavens will descend right here right now
we`re all we`ve got, we`ve got to hold on
together we`ll make a song
that can right every wrong.

Hard Times

2009-06-07T11:10:00.000-07:00

forever it shifts
the right and wrong
my weak and your strong
forever alive in the rift
between what i am and what i ought to be.

a difficult choice
is a gruffy voice
that talks too much
but says nothing.

we live on islands
we become islands
we need other islands
but there arent enough.

there is no me me
its just another image
a tangilbe slice of your imagination
there is no need
to see it
no need for complications.

MAGIC, MAGNETS AND MIRACLES.

2009-05-26T02:04:00.000-07:00

they..
rain down
shine down
fume from spraying waterfalls!
songs...
they`re never created
only discovered
over and again.
songs...
they go to those
who ask for it
believers and lovers
and "us and them"..

it was known
in times of old
in a land where markets sold
songs of copper, silver and gold
A wizard-poet crafted a tune
with divine love and magic boons;
sent it to the Heavens on a full moon.
The tune,
it rumbled like the thunder
it tossed like the waves
it quaked like the earth
and, it took many shapes.

And even today
when it rolls
And even today
when the magic unfolds
on a sunny morning or a night deathly cold,
and You begin to humm a tune
that you have never known;
then believe -
the tune is`nt your own.
These tunes come and go,
don`t question them much;
you were never meant to know.
You borrow it
from all that`s there,
the tune can heal -
it can repair, you.
There`s nothing more true.
The Maker lives in his song
He knew it all, all along.

And as we speak
even today
don`t get me wrong
And even today
this is`nt my song
the story - the tune -
the magic - the half baked moon !
they`re gifts from that wizard-poet;
gifts..that I ripped opened too soon.

A second time.

2009-05-11T14:41:00.000-07:00

its a cool night after a crackling thunderstorm
the calm settles, back to where it belongs
the moon, smudged by a layer of feathery clouds
the wind, like a prince is charming and proud.

everything around
is rainwashed
is brainwashed
everything around
appears more full of nightly colour.

my car is out of gas and i`m stuck on a thin road in the middle of nowhere.
i might be dreaming
but i think i see a small house beaming
and blinking orange lights a behind that tree.

as i walk upto the door
across the pebbled floor
i`m thinking of that man
and how he had implored ---
"please let me in
i`m ill, i`m dying
i cant pull myself anymore".
but i was only a child
peeping from behind the door
staring into his wild eyes
i was scared, unsure.
i let the door go
i rushed upto my room
into father`s arm
my safest zone.
and the memory ends there.

today
as i walk upto this door
across this pebbled floor
needy, hungry, desparate and sore
i wonder if some little boy
will answer my call
and then abandon me
and let the door fall
and rush into his father`s arms.

will he do to me as i did to another?
and will this go on forever?
a permamnent pause vibrating in mute hope
or, a colourful grand dumb show
or, a belief
that faith will not fade away
that someday
life will reply,
i know.

Fragrantly Real

2009-04-19T22:28:00.000-07:00

pressure from rubber coils
leave depressions
leave deep lines on my mind
they block the instinctive flow
leave my judgement blind.
inside my head i sit silent
on that church bench
third from the last,
just on the edge.
head bowed in thought
in prayer
at peace,
the silence echoes off the great walls
though prayers escape to the heavens, with ease.
he listens to me. prayers and conversation all the time.
everynight we talk
we laugh
we cry
everyday emotions on a new high.
this is a new love
no symbiotic ordeal
pouring from the heavens above,
fragrantly real.

Havent you heard..

2009-03-31T13:47:00.000-07:00

what are you doing here mr.moon?
rolling in the dust?
on a shady afternoon?
"i fell. i fell and how!
came rolling in from last night, to now.
do what you can to save the day
the sun is burning out!"

havent you heard
the mighty heavenly things
are falling to the earth
havent you heard
the true and permanent things
are turning to dirt

what are you doing here mr.sky?
hiding in oceans
when you should be gliding high?
"i fell. i fell too soon
came rolling in after the moon
do what you can to save the world
rip its heart. hide in its womb"

havent you heard
the great and heavenly things
are falling to the earth
havent you heard
the true and permanent things
are swift turning to dirt.

what are you doing here mr.soul?
wandering lonely
in a world dark and cold?
tell me! tell me!
have you too been sold?
" i fell. i fell like you
there was nothing anyone could do
do all you can to save yourself
and save what you think is true."

talking to the dawn

2009-03-28T12:42:00.000-07:00

perhaps i am blind now
quite out of my mind now
trusting is a tough task
i`m changing too fast
but
you make me want to love
you make me want to ask, again.

perhaps i am calm now
a little less alarmed now.
the heavens pour peace through you
talking to another dawn, it all feels new.
so
you make me want to love
you make me want to ask, again.
you made me want to undo all i have done
something tells me it might be worth the run
the quiet smile in you
speading happiness inside me too
i can never get enough of you
or maybe i just dont want to.

2009-03-16T05:07:00.000-07:00

where did you sleep that afternoon?
--- i burnt my team too soon.
what did you do to your team?
--- i ate brown bread with white cream.
what did you eat secretly?
--- i lay on the beach sleeplessly.
where did you sleep that after noon?

( this looks like rubbish
too low for your taste
read it from pit to tip
before you call it WASTE )

the tale of the Glass wall

2009-03-08T10:56:00.000-07:00

i know not who i am
what use is realisation
when we`re inevitably damned?
i am the past, the present and the future of me
i am success
when i am what i want to be
i am a broken wing
feathers tearing away, one by one
dangling on thin threads, quivering in the wind
i am the forgotten shoe box
jewels,love letters,dying chocolates and drying kisses
packed and lost, under memory locks.

i am music
i am the peak of salvation
i am the pit of your innermost regrets
i am your rainbow imagination
i am the last sigh of your slit throat
i am your perfect fake smile
i am your karma, rolling back to you
i am you. we`re divine..

Magic Machine

2009-02-24T22:45:00.000-08:00

children often make and break
toys, both real and fake
some hunt for glue
some find it,too
some grow up
some never do
growing up is a big mistake

four kids toyed with toys
a tiny girl and three tiny boys
a fifth joined much after
he said "can i join the games and laughter?"
they played along, unthinking of disaster
good times slip by faster
when youre happily deaf to outer-worldly noise

the kids, they made
a Magic Machine with fire blades
that cut through fog
and had shiny knobs
and butter orbs
and jelly wires and funny chords
in rainbow colours and bright shades

months went by, years too
the children rapidly grew
but there was one among them, who
never grew up.never wanted to.
and when the rest went away
she stood alone, by the way
tears swelling up in her eyes
she meant to crumble and cry
and then she noticed ---
the Magic Machine was ready to fly
a step forward and it would take her high
among moons and stars and unearthly lights
among heavenly sounds and songs that never die

Afterlife

2009-02-20T02:53:00.000-08:00

crossfires with precision
zoom in to ethical decisions
what did you save for afterlife?
we were born liars
plasticity we admire
what can you save for afterlife?

a heavy heart beats through drums
a heavy mind on the guitar strums
a heavy life sings a sad song
pretend perfection like nothings wrong

white, brown or black
all lips smack
for the fat money stacked
in dark secret vaults
living in shacks
we`r back on track
singing back to back
of the same faults

so
the heavy heart beats through drums
and
the heavy mind on the guitar strums
and
the heavy life sings the same sad song
over and over
resounding like a gong
pretending perfection when everything`s gone wrong

perching

2009-02-09T10:17:00.000-08:00

perched on the edge of Madness, dangling thin legs of Reason in the hollow of strange reality below, i routinely fall. i fall. i fall. like an overweight parachute racing to the ground. i fall. i fall. from one edge high above to another down below; to another belower. every fall gets slower and slower. like plopping down steps of sanity plop. stuck again; perched on a new, wobbly edge --- i bide my time. i wander in Falcon dreams where Buddhist chimes and chants help me glide, with eyes shut wide, i gilde -i pout -i wander out.
i am wondering, the prayer hall, the floor in black and white, the golden Budhha, the wooden door a gaping hole and the old monk blowing his ivory horn --- low,clear and forever echoing deep.full.notes blown to the other side of the crumbling woody hanging bridge, where the calm town meditates. the white river gushing below ; the bridge dangling several feet above the spray. the notes resound sun bathed and clean rippling and rolling through the valley.

The Entertainer

2008-12-25T00:38:00.000-08:00

she`s coming to your town
she`s been there before
remember? how she told you about yourself?
now she`s back for more

but she`s no witchy woman
no gypsy on the go
she`s the Ideal Entertainer
forever ready for a show

mainly,
she sings for the pleasure
it rings in her soul
sometimes,
she sings in hope
for a jingle
in her beggar`s bowl
sometimes,
she sings for the people
and what they need to know

she is a healer
a feeler
a dolled-up show stealer
but really
she is a Nobody, at all
she isnt too fair
she isnt too tall
got long black hair
that makes her look small
got big black eyes
got a toothy smile
got a funny pointy nose
and a head full of butterflies

she wears many faces
shows you what you want to see
and when she`s The Entertainer
she`s all you want to be

a book-dried leaf
ripped to the veins
by the hands of fate
and put on display
she wasn`t born this way
she wasn`t always who she is this day
and tomorrow
she will not stay
as she is today.

three fold

2008-12-23T00:59:00.000-08:00

the king said to the pauper
what the enemy said to the friend
there`s far too much in here
to neatly comprehend

there are three paths here
that go three ways
with hairpin bends
that hav much to say

have you met the frog-legged waiter?
i`m sure you wouldn`t want to date her
she`s big and round
and goes around town
eating men like flies
she`s not what you`d want to try

have you met the elf-eared boy?
with three bunny teeth and eyes full of joy
he sells meat and rice
peppered with dead lice
and when he rolls the dice
you must prepare to pay the price

have you met the shapeless light?
i`m sure it guides you on stormy nights
its the breath of the moon
the calm of lazy afternoons
its wisdom arrived too soon
the sacred music that crafts you tunes

a li`l messed up

2008-12-13T12:00:00.000-08:00

a lot of coffee
another groggy morning
the same froggy boss
and his routine warnings
i say ..
arent we all, a li`l messed up?
aint this world, a li`l messed up?
when it all seems so straight and polished
well-mannered and fine
what-do-you-call-it?

they were in love, yeah
they broke up, yeah
she pushed him away
though he wanted to stay
he was all broken
had nothing to say
and then
there came another
and took him away
and then
old love shook her up
all over, in a new way
so she sighs
so she`d say,
its too late. its too late

arent we all a li`l messed up?
aint this world, a li`l messed up?
when it all seems so straight and polished
well-mannered and fine
what-do-you-call-it?

there `s so much to do
much more to know
li`l time to fight
or feed the ego
its the one chance
love`s a one shot go
wink and poof !
grab it! pack it in your fist
stuff it in ur heart
make it grow

knock knock

2008-12-02T12:47:00.000-08:00

KNOCK KNOCK

They are coming.
those colourless, faithless, spineless bastards.
fear - that swift messenger running ahead of Them,
spreads fire through veins of my land,
our bodies,
my head, my hand.

KNOCK KNOCK

They are here.
I cannot live more in fear
my heart stuffed and packed tight in my stomach
my muffled heart, throbs in captivity
my body stiff
i want to move my limbs,
but my traitor hands and feet
disobey the much required activity
i am stuck.
a struggling soul trapped in a dead or paralysed body

KNOCK KNOCK

one of them has found me
the gun and its point stares at me silently
i wish i could satisfy, somehow
meet Their needs
ransom my way out somehow
freely breathe

KNOCK KNOCK

a man falls dead at my feet
warm maroon oozing from a hole above his heart
he died to shield me from the Brute
he died to free me from the root
of my fears

KNOCK KNOCK

come! fight like men, if you will
come! bring your puppet-lot.
how many can you kill?
we fall.we rise,
with doubled strength shinning in our eyes
i have a people to call my own
and them to die for
you have only a heart of stone
full of cowardice; fit for rehearesed-wars

KNOCK KNOCK

we are coming for you
hide and pray
hide and pray
you Brutes!
pray..
for a heart that you can use for a beggar`s bowl
for eyes that with sincerity will show
for a mind that will be pure and true
for a life that will (someday) forgive you

The Black Spider

2008-11-30T08:02:00.000-08:00

Incomprehension when in comprehension, makes sense
Sense, the absence of the absurd
Absurdity, the growing black spider
Spidering its way from body to body to body to body
No body will be spared
Spare the pain, save it for tomorrow; the wounds are too fresh today
Today is a numbness
Numb. Dumb. Overcome
Come, over the green dreamlands we will go, with rainbow butteflies
Fly we will, live we will.

Walking Home

2008-09-30T12:38:00.000-07:00

i`m walking home, i`v no where to go
i`m walking home , i have nowhere to run
and no! the sun don`t shine on me anymore
i`m walking alone

tried losing myself in the maze
tried dark woods
tried long roads
ten thousand and one strange ways

but i keep coming back to myself
can`t lose the fear of loss
dont fear the loss of fear
i keep, coming back to myself

tried losing myself in a mirror
up close and
God knows
i tried to keep myself awake

well, i just keep coming back to myself
cant lose the fear of loss
dont fear the loss of fear
and so, i keep coming back to myself

Faith and Love

2008-07-04T11:14:00.000-07:00

i once met a Good Man

who had much love to spare

he went to the streets

hoping to share

Faith, Love and holiness

hoping the world would care

he packed Faith and Love

in a soiled sack

fastened it well

draped it across his back

traced his fate in a humble pace

till he arrived at a beggar`s shack

"Faith will heal you", said the Good Man

carefully offering scoops of golden Faith from his sack

"no Good Man offers precious gifts", the beggar replied

"take your fake gifts back!"

In good faith the Good Man travelled

over lands,at sea,to homes and havens

no taker did he find

for, hearts of men were barren

at long last did he rest

`neath a tree, in the cool shades, a lazy nest

as sweet sleep spread over his weary eyelids

( will complete it soon..)

ORBS

2008-06-18T01:46:00.000-07:00

it funny
the way i`v been lately
the world rushes away from me
like white foamy waves rushing away from the sea

its funny
this sense of belonging
that brings songs alive

its funny
how, the black goes white
throws up things from inside
but we`r still the same
living in orbs with no name

written on the brittle walls of orbs wrapped in rags -----

** each to his own is the rule of life there is a pause between people which keeps them alive a safe distance from mind to mind from heart to heart from soul to soul better to keep away proximity beckons death of faith,of love,of illusions **

hey mr.joker

2008-05-14T07:29:00.000-07:00

hey mr.joker
do u know what you`re made of?
can you see what you`re made for?
think your work paid off?
pardon me,
i`ve come the wrong way
though its true,
i`ve sure come a long way
keep my 7 dear sins to me
and pretend to be as happy
as the mirror face i see
dont belong
dont believe
dont hope
dont grieve
dont give what no one takes
u need it most anyway,
is it good to be good?
fair to be fair?
the need to be understood
and not compared
the same flaws
the same wrongs
the same laments
the same knowledge dawns ---
born too early, too late
either way
you`re out of time..

For my Little Girl

2008-04-20T00:41:00.000-07:00

cry me your story, Little Girl
I am listening
though people let it go unheard
I am listening

They pity you, they are sorry
when you play to society
lose yourself, sell sobriety
is not selling out to the greed within
a pitiable thing?
if not the unpardonable sin?

you `re guilty but you`re too young
to bear the blame
too young
to be part of the game
too young
to feel the shame

your skin too tender
your heart too weak
your mind too fresh
your soul too clean yet
to let
be part of This world

Cry me your story, Little Girl
I am listening
And i wonder
if soaking you in days of gummy childhood were better?
or ejecting you to coiled old age
would keep you happier,
more free from bonds of slavery
to corruptive youth.
Or graft you unto a Fairie Garden
to guard against corrosive truth.

In these times of toil and trouble
not one of my fancies can grow
they sprout heads, but hide low,
scorched by flash-bulbs
silenced by shutter-bugs,
They wither and sigh.

Brown dry autumn leaves
Brown dry hopes and dreams
Fall with grace, lie silently pressed
to the grey stone, the memory-nest.

At great length,
and breadth and height,
at a distance---
I hear you speak
Too far, too meek
your words for my ears
all too weak
like diamonds they be glistening;
in hope, they maybe whisp`ring
yes,
cry me your story, Little Girl
I am listening...

its about me

2008-03-23T11:17:00.000-07:00

i`m a painter
a sweeper
my brush, my broom
cleaning dust, making room
for my imagination and me

i`m a biker
the morning paper boy
speed and ferocity
rolled in scrolls
dreams spinning in wheels
for my imagination and me

i`m a player
stuck in the usual 9 to 5
lonely songs rotting on last pages of piles of files
lonely songs in the pit, withering unheard
for my imagination and me

just happy

2008-03-09T08:26:00.000-07:00

just be happy
and unreasonable about it
dont look for reasons
dont doubt it

just be happy
and away from yourself
dont look too deep or close
or you`ll tumble into the well

just be happy
and know enough to fuel a smile
dont rip the skies for answers
or beg for Heavenly droppings in style

just be happy
know just as much u need to
to get through
this sleep we call Life

just be happy
about the twins, Worry-Fear
if she gets too close
draw yourself back, far enough to see her
and study and measure, make clear
the noodle thoughts between your ears

just be happy
not too much to ask of yourself

Happiness, bubbles from the tummy
floating its way up,
up the lungs,
up the throat,
up the tongue
and when u make faces at the mirror
there`s two of you smiling,
not just one...

ignominy

2008-02-13T09:16:00.000-08:00

strange world full of strangers
please fit me in
i`ll dance and sing and be your entertainer
to please you, i`ll do anything
pay for my body and mind
the soul is free
when all is sold
and nothing left to buy
try selling ignominy
when i am alone and high
i pour out reasons to cry
clingy, dust on wooden windows
talking leaves run dry
two pounds of jelly and streamers of light
vandalised art soaks volatile sighs

(( to be continued...))

swirl

2008-01-10T08:04:00.000-08:00

life lying around
on the bed
on the couch
on the ground

can i help the moment survive?
make cob webs castles seem shimmering streamers?

lizard stuck in a lamp shade bowl
silhouette growing, fat
feeding on loneliness
webbed paws
sprawling stars or palm leaves?
eating, excreting
adding to the mess

its clouded inside my head
memories.regrets.pain.fragililty.
light.love.mirror.illusion.reality.
its growing, bellowing, inside.
devouring my mind space
biting in on my rationality
i`m left with much less of what i need, to return

at the bottom of the swirl
i find it like it is
like it should be
like it has been
like it will be

there is but one love
of the Lord , it is
out live the rest
live out of the rest
and you will see
(all of us must some day)
this body and all of it, melts away
clouds inside clear
the light inside joins the greater Light beyond
all awakens.
all breathes.
all rests.
all is peace.

It makes me wonder

2007-12-02T21:40:00.000-08:00

Can nature think?
Can it advise?
Does wisdom come at a price?
Do killer machines cry
after mowing down lives?
Do walls whisper
after conspirators leave the room?
Does the city breathe stories
nightly to the moon?
Is the mind within the brain?
Does either ever sleep?
Is the Self in the name?
Is the owl of the Devil`s breed?

The clock ticks
but have you heard Time?
I choose not my birth or death
how then is my life, mine?

awake yet alive...

2007-12-02T21:37:00.000-08:00

Awake my pretty one,
from shrouds and shades
to dusks and twilights
to returns of crystal shadows

Awake my little one
`midst a desert
a cube,by a ladder,
a horse,flowers and bad weather

Awake, pretty little one
think of the It
you are Its prism
Receive. Embody. Intend Kindness. Improve.

IS THIS A DREAM?

2007-11-26T06:48:00.000-08:00

this is a dream.

did i walk into yours?
did you crawl into mine?
or is this another`s,
He who lives out of time?
or is it of another
who knows not you or me
who silently in the future hides
swords,eyes and sorcery.

is it here
that past and present meet?
collide to create a present,
a life; what a wonderful treat!
each sends waves
across the Sea of Time
together they snip and shape
the Gift, a dot in the Line.

dots and lines
bright spots in the sky
twinkle and talk
softly sigh

they too talk about dreams.

"did i walk into yours?
did you crawl into mine?
are we snared in the giant web
of the Dream of Mankind?"

thank you AMY LEE...

2007-11-04T22:32:00.000-08:00

"without the mask
where will you hide?
can`t find yourself
lost in your lies...

i know the truth now
i know who you are..."

( from EVERYBODY`S FOOL)

" so go on and scream
scream at me, i` so far away
i wont be broken again
i`ve got to breathe
i can`t keep going under"

( from GOING UNDER)

GLASSLORE

2007-10-27T08:36:00.000-07:00

(( this is what i think GLASS ONION believes in and therefore...IS ))

my fingers glass doors
my feet are glass floors
my body, a glass store
i have a hollow core

what are you? star or stone?
eitherway, both alone
ivy silence overgrown
glass bubbles stay unknown

what leads today
tomorrow will follow
what follows now
will lead tomorrow

my strings are overplayed
notes rest in nimble shades
my thoughts have more than strayed
these brains, they think in grey

us here, just friends and me
we`re high, as high as can be
we play, its plain to see
no flash, nothing to mean

reflections

2007-10-16T07:24:00.000-07:00

its been too much of me lately
ego,orange sunsets and vanity
the first ant born thinks he`s special
but then he`s only just an ant,
isnt he?

aimless as i am
i roam the streets in my head
i`m too lazy to work my legs
blurred as this vision is
i peep through quarter of a consciousness
i`m too feeble to stare wide and clear

so what do i do now?
i dont want this anymore
not beacuse i dont need it
but because it not the same anymore
it never can be the same all the time
how foolish of me to ask of something constant
how stupid is the want
to be different, to be loved, to be made to feel special
this is but a reflection of the Ideal
far removed from the truth
that never can be touched or seen or lived

can i find my space amidst reflections?
am i reflection too?
or am i a portion of the Truth?

CODED LIES

2007-10-09T05:40:00.000-07:00

THIRD LETTER, FIRST WORDS

DOWNWARD ADD
TRICK READER, SOUNDS HEARD
WILL BE SAD
TILL THE SOIL

RUB THE SEED
BREW AND BOIL

TASTE THE WEED
HEAVENS CURSE
WAVES RISE
ENEMIES NURSE
CODED LIES

THE DOUBLE GYRE

2007-10-08T05:50:00.000-07:00

i live in two worlds
both are mine
in my mind
and out if it
both are me

i am myself and another
the girl and the flower
or the bug
or the tower
or the mug
or the leaf on the river
that flows on the face
involved yet isolated

i live in two worlds
as each lives in me
a knot of steel
i am what i feel
i feel what i know
knowledge begets pain

i am my pane
pride in vain
pure love, now stained
imaginationin enchained

i`ve lived my dreams
now, i rest, satisfied
satisfaction kills
i bid my time

RIVER

2007-10-08T05:41:00.000-07:00

i breed life but am i alive?
tears keep pouring
am i crying?
rivers keep flowing
so do i
I am a river
never born, never died

when the blood
in the river flows
the reeds
they kiss the wind
and as it blows
my mute self
cries but never grows
no...
no...

i burn myself,
them and things
they fly when i spread my wings
flames keep growing
fierce and high
never born, never died

when the wrath
in the fire burns
the Fates, they spin
the wheel
and as it turns
alone -- my burnt self
dies but never learns
no...
no...

overcome

2007-10-07T08:57:00.000-07:00

i`m not made for this
i`m not made for the melodies or rhythms of music
i was not granted this body for you to use and abuse
i did not climb so far only to lose grip on my sanity and sink into madness
i do not sit in darkness and wait for light to make love to me
neither do i wait for you to come
i was not blessed with this vision only to stare at stars at night
i do not wish to change you
i`m not made for poetry or people or power
i do not exist
i am not

The Cause.....??

2007-05-01T05:36:00.000-07:00

B L O O D R E D R U B I E S C R Y S T A L D E W D R O P S F R E S H GREEN LEAVES
S E V E R A L O R A N G E F A I R I E S A N D E L F I S H T H E I V E S
R U N I N T O E A C H O T H E R IN THE C H A O S OF T H I N G S
W E K N O W NOT WHAT WE DO
W H A T A P P E A R S IS N O M O R E T R U E
T H A N T H E B R O T H E R OF R E A L I T Y ON F E A T H E R Y W I N G S
Y O U DIED B E T R A Y E D T A T T E R E D AND F R A Y E D
G A V E UP Y O U R S M I L E TO S A V E M I N E
Y E T NO G U I L T M O V E S MY H E A R T
A S I D R I N K Y O U R B L O O D IN W I N E
T H E G U I L T OF N O T B E I N G G U I L T Y
T H E A C H I N G I N A B I L I T Y TO C R Y
W E R E Y O U R gifts T O ME
B E S I D E S L A B O U R AND T O I L
I S U F F E R T I L L I D I E

Ode to the Night

2007-05-01T05:19:00.000-07:00

(( dedicated to Calcutta University ))

with beautiful eyes you look down on me
I am a helpless soul, wand`ring alone
while you have winds and stars for company
I gaze for days at your pale moon and mourn
I sing aloud for you to hear, my dear
but the Crickets and the "ribbitts" are louder
the ripples on the lake become more clear
as your deathly darkness creeps and crowds her

the winds cease. The waters still. The stars icy cold.
my breath held tight, i wait for you to sing
your sounds of silence grow steadily bold
it soothes then stirs then shakes then it stings

jealous as I am... for you have company, i have none
rather I cling to you than Men, they leave fresh wounds undone

(( a limerick dedicated to edward lear ))

2007-05-01T05:17:00.000-07:00

Li`l Ric Fuel lived in the woods
he hated things holy and good
fell through the open
his wings now broken
Li`l Ric Fuel lives in the woods

Futility of Solitude

2007-05-01T05:08:00.000-07:00

poets through ages
words through sages have
spoken of your charm
of how you lure
ail without cure
yet leave One unharmed

by myself in this room am I ?
no...not wholly alone
you shadow me everywhere
live in the tears you make me cry
in the scars that remain unshown

of what use be bliss
that brings no ease?
that shred the mind
tears thought from thought
tears Me from Me

of what use be solitude
that brings no peace?
in its stead
returns in time
to haunt and haunt
drown Me in Me

our story

2007-05-01T04:57:00.000-07:00

laying by my soul
i watch purple clouds streaming across the night sky
angry clouds....they rush by
but I lay stupified
in dreams.
locked in the scheme of things
lost in spiral rings

I dont want to know
I dont want to grow.... but
just lay
and watch the world go by

what we live is not life
but a pause
in this Play called Creation

Bright stars blink in awe
at my perfect world
I blink back
Still laying on my back
at constellations left intact
despite years of uncertainty

You are no more perfect than I
Your world is the same as mine
everyday
We whisper our story to the lonely nightsky
and lay...in hope
someone would over hear it sometime...

what am i about

2007-03-14T06:05:00.000-07:00

what am i about?
it looks like
it feels like
it tastes like
the end is near

n now that i`m out of time
heartbeats outta rhyme
i`m thinking hard
what am i about?

lights blazing in my eyes
can hear me loud n live
no i cant hide
they see me
wherever i go
whatever i do

the sun`s gone
the moon will too
no day after now
night comes soon
it looks like
it smells like
it sounds like
it tastes like
yeah...it feels like
the end is here

the leader

2007-02-18T05:46:00.000-08:00

dull white specs germinate on a black velvet sky
killing me softly..and i dont know why
i`m thinking of you....

easier to be
a rugged ruffian,
a white politician,
a crafty magician on a fooling spree
than melt into the crowd of anonymity

nobody wants to be a Nobody, but
it isnt any easier being Someone
so i stare hard and cold
time and again i`m told
these eyes cannot reveal You to me
You are beyond my senses,
far far away

i wait..
as i have..for long now..
lines of Fate run crazy on my palms
reborn at each dawn, shy and shallow
they know not how to be
know not how to guide me

Fickle and frail, Fate changes rapidly
Fickle and frail, it makes me
Trickle and trail, these alien thoughts
do i lead the Line or
does it lead me?

winter

2007-01-08T09:02:00.000-08:00

its in my head, at the tip of my hair
the smoke, the cold, lines out of control
bewitched moonlight pouring from above
rotting sensuality in the name of love
birth bubbles burst, blurt an aching truth
but you wouldn`t run away even if you could
in awe of this miracle of life
blindfolded.. you marry a Compromise
proud to be called a Wife
more a lump of flesh
sliced by the Thought-Knife
now hell and its Master
unnerve you nomore
you live in the horrid laughter
but wail at the core
shy away from those few
who know and yell...."the joke`s on you!:

PAPER GIRL`S PRIDE

2006-12-22T23:49:00.000-08:00

the girl, she walks the metal road
a metal strip with metal bolts
gates of metal blades ahead
she looks back, but the road is dead
the METAL MACHINE, it snips and snaps
shredding skin to bloodless scrap
the metal hands of a metal clock
munching time, it tocks and tocks
yet the girl, she walks... she walks...
when did it begin.. where will it stop..

the metal road then metamorphosed
to a broken arm of an ailing cliff
across the neck, towered the other shoulder
down the throat boils fire and boulders
and He beckoned from the other side
those loving arms, strecthed out wide
while she stood here, her large imploring eyes
pouring poetry with little to hide
she must leap off this crumbling cliff
she must reach to the other side
what if.. she must fail ? she must fall ?
and sink into the seething fiery tide ?

with two winks to think
and as much to sigh
she breathed deep and hollow
till the breath hurt inside
her right foot afloat in the air
the other, uncertain on the edge of the crumbling cliff
she let go for love.. not life..
her eyes sinking into His

arms wrapped around herself, this Wonder Butterfly
spun again her cocoon, with a broken smile
that shone lightly on her tender lips
in the flames of the burning tide around her
as she melt into the volcanic depths
no solemn words, no bitter regrets
but only a trickle of poetry, from those large imploring eyes

" NOTHING IS FOREVER
FOR ALL THAT LIVES MUST DIE
TO BECOME NAMES
OR MEMORIES
OR STARS IN THE SKY "

mind plateau

2006-11-21T05:53:00.000-08:00

streaming blue thoughts pour into the mind bowl
sleeping dreams wake a dreaming soul
autumn leaves crawl along thirsty drains
parched eyes long for the kiss of rain
filmstrip faces flashing here and there
moments too precious to lose or share
the gods play their songs
the guards sound the gongs
the MIND PLATEAU
is forming, is rising
is setting upon me and you
the MIND PLATEAU
will crush you so low
OLD FOOL...you wouldnt even know!

curio

2006-11-03T08:47:00.000-08:00

cry a tear for me..my heart is dry
say something..its not hard if you try
smile a little..make it reach my eyes
take me away..hold me up..make me shine

can i be your star tonight?
will the night fade away?
can you paint my mind
a pale shade of grey?

The Prince of Darkness

2006-11-01T03:21:00.000-08:00

nothing fair, no jewelled robes
no more than tattered rags has he
no sword no sceptre
no chariots for his majesty
yet in his stride he wakes
creatures decaying in hells below Hell
with his cold stare he churns
warmth off jubilant souls
no gates no walls
no bounds can hold his wrath
no glory no worth
no life no birth can lure him forth
in his strife he grows and groans and grows
his empire willing to disown
Prince of Darkness, He
mauls the womb of Earth
to find and plant his first foot on fresh ground
bellows and roars unearthly sounds
to declare the initiation of the final END...

wish

2006-10-23T09:49:00.000-07:00

all year round the bees
buzz around in hope
of the sweetness
that greets them rarely

all night long she sings
to the moon and the cold air
her dreams disappear
blow in her hair

all this while you pray
you wait for wishes to come true
futile are those dying lights
when you feel alive
you selfish thing !
lost in the intoxicating celebration
evanescent ecstasy
you return to dust....defeated

wasp whisperings

2006-10-12T08:59:00.000-07:00

whats whispering
wasp whisperings
hazy maroon nights
victims to gibberish
a thought in my head throbs for you

it cant be you
maybe it shouldnt be me
it wont work
but maybe?

four wheeled bodies
chuggin` on and on
who did you save last night?
victims to gibberish
hazy nights get worse
sore needs to be nursed

think..breathe..talk..
think..breathe..talk..
watch..feel..dream..
watch..feel..dream..
know..smile..sleep
know..smile..sleep

the golden kite

2006-09-28T00:29:00.000-07:00

its flying away,far away from home
a golden crushed kite
lost and alone
the trees below
they go they go
the rivers too
so slow so slow
the stories echo
from many years ago

the tower calls...
death stands tall...
flight meets a fall...

if you find it
atop any tower
let it free and fly it far
i lost my kite
dont you too
the towers have many
now the sky needs a few

miracle

2006-08-27T01:25:00.000-07:00

none of these will last,
none of those did
all is slipping fast
win the last bid

a miracle can save us
down by the river where he stays
purple sky on still water prayers
and a rusty sun he lays

lets do this again
meldoy screams,wind bell chimes
get off the cliff now
u wont fall this time

a miracle can save us
will pull it through
just have to
a miracle must save me
i believe u can

PHANTASMAGORIA

2006-07-28T08:22:00.000-07:00

think deep, understand the signs
delve deepr, decipher minds
dont aim too high
and you`ll see
its easy to be satisfied
to imagine
where rocky mountains lie
echoes ring shy
a girl,ivory white
cascading tresses,cream flowing dresses
pair black pearly eyes, beautifully bright
no fairy she, only an ice maiden
warrior`s robes forsaken
bleeded the Seven Deadly Sins
gliding away from it all
she rises, above the pure

FEEL THE ILLUSION
RELENTLESS RECLUSION
DELIRIOUS DELUSION
SOLITARY SOLUTION
INEVITABLE FUSION
WITH COSMIC CONFUSION
MYTH OF INTUITION
PSYCHIC INTRUSION
into a world little our own....

THE GAME

2006-07-14T22:27:00.000-07:00

lines cut into my fate
over my palms
over my feet
over my face

what more can i do, but wait
watch time....yawn...stretch...awake
or, scurry for its own sake
or, strut at its own pace

tails to tales
linger on to be unveiled
pieces of the puzzle
when apart cause trouble
when together, grin and sneer
and put me to shame
they tell me there are

"rules for every game
though played right, are not the same
what is yours will remain
for the rest, you struggle in vain"

dream on

2006-07-14T04:20:00.000-07:00

rest a while,beneath your friendly sky
wait for angles to die
before you earn your place in heaven

if your rocket crashes into the sea
dream bigger, be happy
you have wonders to do
myths to deny
shine on a new day, death to defy

you must walk the road
give what it takes
to say something before you go
reason with your mistakes
and know
someday, far and away
in your loving memory
they`ll enviously pray
"I WISH I WAS YOU
AND I WISH IT WAS MY DAY...."

2 lemons & a slice of sky

2006-07-14T04:15:00.000-07:00

2 lemons & a slice of sky
curtain breath blowing on the tides
it feels high
2 lemons & a slice of sky
no body sells me
no body buys
no body fails me
they aught not to try
when i`m all alone
the low wind blows
i find myself trying
2 lemons & a sip of sky
dont you know why
we feel the same
though, my world`s on the other side
we`re coloured
in debts not our own
dont you know why
it feels so light
when you let go
of what you held back inside
dont you know why
it feels so right
to blur the loss in the lies
and drown in only
2 lemons & a slice of sky

" I-M-A-G-I-N-E "

2006-06-22T07:16:00.000-07:00

i shut my eyes, yet i see
twenty thousand eyes blinking at me
i clog my ears, yet i hear
twenty thousand hearts throbbing very near
i drop my pen, yet i know
around the world there are
several thousand pens scratching alone

as many mouths talking
as many heads thinking
as many clocks ticking
as many shoes walking

as many people, many more to come
add them up, you get One
his head this world is
he turns to go his way
many more heads in the crowd
to the monotony of work they sway

as many spoons feeding
as many fears bleeting
as many lives repeating
as many thoughts breeding

as many people, yet more to come
pack us all together
you wont have none

imagine.... my friend,
what would it be like
to live beneath the surface
to know wrong from right?

My Utopia

2006-06-17T22:24:00.000-07:00

A pin binds paper, as
Time binds me
The mind binds people
As close as can be.

This body no greater is
Than mind shall be
Together these more feeble
Than art`s simplicity.

What can be got
Of thirst and thought?
No twist in the common tale of life
What can`t be sought
In this messy lot
Remains my lazy strife.

in the rain

2006-06-06T02:31:00.000-07:00

its new and nice, a fresh rush of rain
in sheets... cascading, parading
pouting plump clouds giggle,fight in vain
tears of joy on metal roads
scrubbing dusty leaves
a lazy drop lingers on my nose
and i see
a world gone topsy turvy!
well......
im singing in the rain
i dont sound so right
but im singing in the rain
i know im feeling bright

GREY

2006-06-05T03:19:00.000-07:00

go on,fool me,trod all over
break me if you can
when you` ve failed,
when you`re tired of tricking me so
i`ll still be by you to hold your hand

we`ll only learn some more
nothing to lose, nothing to fear
we`ll go back to being strangers to our shadows
Lovely Soft Dark
.......further yet near

in my mind I`ve been
through rainbow days of our being
in my heart i hide
Cocoon Words in silky sheen
to be born in time
i trust you
but you hurt me and mine
in my wrath i seethe
Hatred Fire I breathe
you`re not what i need
so why am i patient with you?
this old cold game can`t get more new
I FORGIVE IN FORGIVING YOU

and
sleep in my belief in you
if i dont wake
if i dont dream
you should know
it is what is seems

To....Chiquita,

2006-06-03T11:56:00.000-07:00

will we explore?
beyond your face?
beyond your name?
beyond disgrace?
will we join
in your opaque existence?
will we console
your clay heart?
condone and depart?
set you apart?
love you as you fade in time?
will we last you,
dear chiquita?

feather on a bed of clouds

2006-05-22T23:44:00.000-07:00

wondering by myself,
in the twilight of miracles
wreathing Memory Leaves
how far? how far have you come?
a bouquet of prayers bloom to blessings
i ,the feather, rest on a bed of clouds
a world of wings and waltz
humming birds and wasps
beckon me, take me home
to my world of midnight magic
where i know im not alone...

mr.rice bug

2006-05-22T23:37:00.000-07:00

my eyes wide with wonder,my palm out flat
on it,creeping and crawling
a certain mr.rice bug sat
twisting and truning
fussing and tossing
scratching and biting my skin
in his velvety brown hide
black eyes had he
limbs mighty thin
rolled on his back
shot his arms up in the air
fought with it, or said a prayer
touchd his head to his feet
straightened and rolled again
it seemed to me,
he gasped in pain
lay cold and still
just when i thought he was dead
wriggled and schocked me instead!
rolled on his fleshy bed
touched his feet to his head
was he in pain?
or payer?
or a fit of laughter?
i could not tell
he jumped off my palm,
with a crippled leg and a heart of steel
was lost in the wilderness
as he fell....